My mom is awesome

I absolutely adore my mother. After putting up with my shenanigans for the last 21 years, she deserves a really big trophy and probably some sort of monument so that everyone can be aware of the saint-like patience she exhibits, despite all the crap I've thrown her way. I always thought her parenting life would get a little easier when I "grew up" and went to college. Instead, I started drunk-texting her. I'm sure my drunk texts have often left her worried for my safety and/or health. I know she's stayed up till the wee hours of the morning waiting for my drunk call to tell her that I didn't get roofied and no one is walking around in a laura-skin suit. She actually calls me after last call now if she hasn't heard from me, because sadly, me not drunk dialing/texting my mom at some point in the evening is the rare occurrence.  I think I've finally worried her to the point that she now just accepts my behavior and takes it all in stride. I don't think anything I say really surprises her anymore. She no longer questions my antics or tries to talk to me sensibly. She has swiftly moved past the denial and anger stages and now rests comfortably in acceptance.

please note: my mother is not one for the technology... she still doesn't know how to work our DVD player, so the fact that she knows how to text at all is miraculous. She is actually an educated, articulate woman who does not speak the way she texts, just so you know.


I had talked to my mom after class in the afternoon, I told her I was planning on going out but I had not talked to her since then...

Naturally, this is how I choose to make contact:

(10:49pm) Me: Please bring me your fanny packs tomorrow
(10:49pm) Mom: What u planning
(10:52pm) Me: 80s & 90's party!
(10:54pm) Me: All spice girls wear fanny packss!
(10:54pm) Mom:What u wearing besides fanny pack and big hair
(10:55pm) Me: You should also bring the vanna white dress in my closet lol
(10:55pm) Mom: Ok
(12:08am) Me: I now have 2 vday dates :/
(12:09am) Mom: Feast or famine
(12:37am) Me: story of my life
(12:38am) Mom: Yeah


Most importantly: My mom is awesome because she owns multiple fanny packs.




NOTE: two of my guy friends have asked for the pleasure of my company this valentine's day, and I accepted both offers (one for movie, one for dinner? I'm not sure how I'll work it out, but they do it in movies all the time. & i like to think I'm smarter than the average bear, so ill make it work). Perhaps they read my blog and realized how pathetic my love life is and want to turn things around for me, or they read it and came to the conclusion that I don't have the highest standards and am probably getting desperate. Either way, I figure the more suitors I line up, the more likely at least one will go well, or horribly badly and keep the valentine's day humor alive for yet another year!